Gym- Day 1

They say the first day is always the hardest and they are right. It took a lot of motivation just to put my shoes on but I did it and I made it back to the gym! It felt so good to get back there. Just gotta keep on, keepin on! Maybe I can even work myself up and get rid of this oxygen. That would be awesome! Here's to many more days of working hard! -Katie

So Tired.

So yesterday I finally spent Christmas money and went to get my hair done. Everything I do, even at home, makes me tired. I'm always tired or lazy! Anyway, it took 2 hours to get my hair done and I even joked that I would go home and immediately go to sleep because of how tired getting my hair did made me (doesn't everyone get exhausted siting in a chair)!? So I get home yesterday around 2:ish and didn't even take off my shoes. Dalton had a glass of water and my oxygen for me and I crashed on the couch. Around 5:00 I woke up and thought I was gonna stay up so Dalton and I talked about what we wanted for dinner. He decided to make something and I asked him if he would care if I could just lay back down for a while. So I went back to sleep (still in my jeans but now without shoes and now in my bed)! I fell back asleep and when dinner was ready I woke up and ate. I was still hungry but I told myself I would eat in just a second and after just a few bites I fell asleep. I slept from 6-11 and then Dalton woke me up to go to bed. I thought for sure I was going to be hyper and not be able to sleep and well by 12 the TV was off and I was back in bed and I was asleep. This morning I woke up about 9-10 and it is now 1:30 and I'm exhausted. I am supposed to go to the gym today. I may take a nap before I go. I am so tired! Trust me, I'd rather work all day than nap all day! Someone give me energy!!!! -Katie

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I have so much on my mind that I just can't simply put it onto paper. 

Puppy Blog Part II

This picture was taken back in April 2011. We had Marley for a little over a year and we had just gotten Bo. Bo was so small back then. He was actually about the same size as Marley. And Marley is about 15 lbs. Bo (as you learned in the puppy blog part I) is a rescue dog. When we got him he was terrified, a nervous, anxious wreck, and just a very hurt, abused puppy. We have worked and worked with him. He still has his days, but they are few and far between. He especially likes to protect me, even from Dalton sometimes, though he loves Dalton, you can just tell. Here's just a funny time in Bo's life when he was a puppy and learning...

After Dalton and I moved out of his grandmas house, we moved into an apartment in St. Charles, MO. It was a cute apartment. You walk into the front door and you are standing in a hallway to the left of you is the hall leading to the living room and to the right it leads down to the bath and bedroom. Well, we kept Bo and Marley in two crates every time we would go somewhere. Bo hated being in his crate. He would hide under the bed, in the bathroom, under the couch, under the table, just to get away from the crate when he knew we were about to leave. Well we started outsmarting him and closing all of the doors and he would sit at the end of the hallway and he could look down the hall and see his crate and we would say 'come on Bo' and he would back up to the bedroom door as close as possible and sit there and stare at us. At the time all we wanted was to leave to get to our job, date, etc. but looking back, it is so weird how scared of the crate he used to be. It must have been from all of the abuse he had gotten I think. Now his crate is referred to as his house and he has no problem. In fact if he knows we're leaving, (we put our coats on and take them outside to potty), when he comes back in, he goes straight to his 'house' without being asked. That's my boy! -Katie

Transplant Update

I had my first transplant call last night!!! It was my time to get new lungs. I called them back but it ended up being a no go. But if it was meant to be, God would have let it happen. It wasn't meant to be. I'm not sad or upset that I am not getting my transplant today. I am feeling happy and hopeful that I'm close to receiving the gift of life. Please pray for the donor family who lost a loved one last night, wherever they may be. -Katie

Puppy Blog Part I

They are the two cutest creatures in the world! They both have four legs, and like to sniff each others butts.. Anyone know who I am talking about? It's our puppies, Bo and Marley! I really felt like blogging but had no idea what to blog about so I figured I would throw a little puppy into the mix! (Thanks to the suggestion from Wendy Cherry)

Bo---------------><---------------Marley

On the left is Bo. His birthday is Nov. 2, 2010. He was a rescue puppy. We got him from a pet store called Petland in Missouri. When they received him, they said that he was malnourished, had worms, and was just a very sick puppy. Nobody had ever properly taken care of him... When we went to the pet store we were actually going to get his brother because his brother was more playful and Bo just sat there right beside Daltons leg and wouldn't really move. He was quite shy, and a little anxious. But, Dalton wanted Bo so that's the one we got. I'm not really sure where the name Bo came from either but we had it picked out before we left the store. We took Bo up to the counter to pay for him (and all his treats). We sat him up on the counter and that's where it all started, he peed all over the counter. Little did we know that would be the beginning of what I like to call the disaster toddler puppy! 

On the right is Marley. She is the first born and her birthday is Dec. 22 2009. Dalton and I moved into our first apartment together at the beginning of 2010 and of course we wanted to have a little family. We went into Petland thinking we would get a gerbil or a hamster. Those things are easy enough to take care of. If we want to play with it, get it out of its cage and put it in the ball and watch it roll across the floor. Easy, peasy. Well, we walked into the pet store and after playing with just about every hamster and every gerbil, I was bored. None of them wanted to play and they all hid from my ginormous hand every time that I reached down into their cage! So I just looked at Dalton and said, 'let's just look at the puppies'. They were all SO cute! I wanted to take them all home. Every cage I walked past the price tag seemed to increase, $600, $700, $1000. I am sorry, I love dogs as much as the next girl but there is no way I am paying that much. So we went up to the pet store employee and asked, 'what is your cheapest dog?' That may seem funny to some but we were serious. The guy pointed over to a cage with a puppy bulldog and a puppy cock-a-poo (which is Marley). The bulldog was laying in the cage trying his very best to sleep while Marley was hopping up and down, wall to wall, trying to play with him! When we said we will see her and they took her out of the cage it was like we saw the bulldog take a sigh of relief! After a while of playing with her we decided we would take her! Come to find out she was next on the chopping block too.. Ya know, they can't keep those puppies forever. Sad but true. So we got Marley and all of her treats and toys and took her home. I will never forget her ride home. She had an Easter scarf on and it was raining. She sat in my lap in the front seat and shivered and hugged my arm all the way home.

Stay tuned for my next puppy blog where I tell you all about the adventures of Bo and Marley!
-Katie

Drowning

Imagine this. You are swimming in the middle of the ocean. You aren't sure how you got there, that's just where you woke up. You can't see anything or anyone else. All you can feel is the weight of the world on your arms and legs. You're finding it so hard to swim so you lay idle trying to catch your breath and get some rest. After a few minutes you decide to start swimming again. It's so hard to swim and you start to struggle. You are slowly going under and coming back up. You go back under and this time get a mouthful of water. Thankfully, you come back up and cough it out. Your arms and legs aren't working together to successfully swim and you go under yet again. You are drowning. Panic sets in and you start wailing your arms and it only makes it worse...

Now, imagine this. 

Imagine every minute of everyday it feels like you are drowning. Imagine waking up coughing and struggling to breathe. Imagine that no matter how much oxygen you have attached to your nose that it feels like you can't get a good breath in. Imagine you are drowning. 

This is what I feel like everyday. No amount of oxygen or breathing treatments or exercise make it better. Everyday that I wake up I automatically feel like I am in the middle of an ocean, drowning, with nothing to save me. The smallest movements can make me feel so short of breath. I need oxygen with every step I take. Sometimes things get so bad that I literally scream for help while gasping because I don't know what else to do, there's nothing I can do about the feeling. 

The only thing I can do now is push forward. I smile and know that one day I will get my lungs! -Katie

Update

So, it's Friday, Jan. 10th! I haven't wrote anything in quite a few days so I will just do a little update! We had an appointment on Wednesday. Dalton's PFTs were 17% and he weighed 107. So he lost a couple pounds but wasn't too bad. He is staying on IVs for another week just because he wants to and other than that all is well. My PFTs were 15% and I weighed 90 pounds. I took myself off of IVs. I am done with them for a while. They don't seem to be doing anything anyway! 

Nothing else is going on this way. We had a calm Christmas and New Year. Our next appointment is Feb. 5th. I will update again before that though.